Prepared for the Flood

I was prepared for the way today was going to be.
I don't have a great history for Birthday's. They never have gone quite as planned. Mostly because I rely on my friends to make them fun for me, I mean that's what I have always done for them.
Expectations.
I knew today was going to be a dim one because of my recent choices. I knew coming back from Rehab, that there were going to be a right many people in this town that just plain weren't going to miss me.
Really miss me.
Out of sight out of mind as it goes, fairweather fans.
I was prepared to have no plans and no one to eat a birthday dinner with.
I was ready to have to make my own excitement as it were.

Well the day has come and went. My parents took me out to a nice lunch but that's where the story ends.
A friend came back into town just today for my birthday, and completely bailed on me to go hang out with his roommate. No bowling. No stupid sober games. No nothing. I know its stupid to dwell on and in all reality I am only writing about it to get it off my chest.
I know I'm freaking 25, but a part of me is 12 inside. If you know me, you know this to be a fact.
So the 12 year old inside of me is kicking rocks and pouting his bottom lip out right now, feeling sorry for himself and wanting everyone to know it. I can't help that.
I'm not spoiled, nor do I feel entitled to anything.
But it would have been a pleasant surprise if at least 1 person who were able to spend some time with me...actually did.
Just for the sake of it.

The best part of this birthday? The fact that it's over and I can get on with my life. Tomorrow a friend has planned a funky lunch and then Alanna comes to see me.
At least I'm sober.
24 hours at a time.
Goodnight...

Oh and I have a sponsor now. *bling*